So as a new home owner I expected to spend my first weekend wandering around the grounds gazing proudly at our new purchase. However, Ali suggested that we might want to consider decorating the downstairs loo. Given that the wallpaper is so bad it would make Barbara Cartland think it was a little bit too pink, I foolishly agreed. Now as I have been living in rented accommodation for the last 15 years you have to understand that I haven't done any decorating since I was 14 and painted my bedroom black gloss. Incidentally, my old bedroom is now my dad's office and it is still black gloss.
"So anyway" I thought, "whip off a bit of wall paper and tosh up a splosh of paint. How hard can that be?". In short, very. The wall paper appeared to have been attached to the wall using molten lead. It took me seven hours to get the wall stripped. I was sweating like a scouser in a spelling test. "Still", I reasoned, "just need to slap on the paint and the jobs done". But I hadn't taken account of the other things I find I have to do. I need to wash the walls and then rinse them. Then I need to fill in any imperfections with Polyfiller. I didn't think there would be any imperfections but now I understand where the phrase "papering over the cracks" comes from. At this point I have to sand the bloody walls. Then I have to paint them in primer before I can eventually get round to putting the paint on. I'm just glad it is only the smallest room.